The journey of writing my recent book, Moral Injury: Healing the Healers, has been a challenging, introspective, and ultimately healing process. The hardest part of this journey was not the technical aspects of writing, but rather the deep and personal vulnerability that surfaced in the process.
The book focuses on those who care for others, and the moral injuries they often endure. In the course of my research and interviews, I was confronted with deeply personal and often painful stories from those in healing professions. These were stories of individuals who, in their pursuit to aid others, found themselves grappling with profound moral dilemmas, which left them deep emotional wounds. Some of the wounds were gaping wide open, some were healing, and others were scarred over after years of healing.
It was a shared narrative of pain, guilt, and regret, but also of resilience and hope. Each story was a testament to human strength, and each story required me to step into a space of empathetic understanding. It was a humbling and moving experience, but it also brought to the surface my own vulnerabilities.
Before embarking on this project, I would have said that I hadn’t experienced much moral injury and that I wasn’t in pain. However, as I delved deeper into the narratives of others, I found myself reflecting on my own past. I discovered personal events that were very painful and that I had not fully processed. I discovered that vulnerability is not a sign of weakness, but a sign of our shared humanity. This inspired me to share my own painful and vulnerable stories from my past experiences as a physician.
Writing the book and sharing these vulnerable stories was undoubtedly hard. But, as I navigated this path of vulnerability, I also found it to be therapeutic. Writing became a process of healing, not just for me, but hopefully for my readers as well.
This journey has taught me that vulnerability is not something to be shunned, but embraced. It is through our shared vulnerabilities that we connect with others on a deeper level. It’s through these shared experiences that we find strength, resilience, and ultimately, healing.
In conclusion, the hardest part of writing Moral Injury: Healing the Healers was confronting, embracing, and sharing my own vulnerability. But, it was through this process that I found a deeper sense of empathy, understanding, and personal growth.
